How much for the women?

Enough of this heavy serious stuff for now - I'm thinking about good old-fashioned friendship tonight. A shout out to the people who bring us laughter, emotional support, stories, commiseration, and generally make our lives more enjoyable just by being themselves.

Having been an introvert for most of my life, I've been fairly selective in my close friends. There are a few from college, a handful left from high school, and at least one or two from as far back as grammar school. But there is the Family.

I've been planning the 40th birthday recently of a very good girlfriend - she and I and two other girlfriends have celebrated at least twenty years together. We've lived through five husbands (yes, do the math), seven kids, jobs/volunteer work/stay-at-home choices, multiple camping and ski trips, hundreds of concerts, too many bottles of Grand Marnier to count, and the fact that we're all Scorpios. We know things about each other that we will never reveal (or at least not for less than six figures). Years ago, we became Family - not by necessity but by active choice.

I am not a girl's girl, and I don't trust groups of women in general. But more than anyone else in my life, these women would challenge, support, defend, encourage, and love me in the face of any adversity -- and I'd do the same for them. It's hard to believe that we're all in our 40s now - it can't possibly have been that many years. On the other hand, I know we'll be saying that another 20 years from now when we're planning our 60th birthdays (in Italy, at the villa on Lake Como one of us will have purchased from George Clooney's estate...)

I think I'm also lucky enough to have this kind of friendship with a handful of men as well. Not that we're planning trips together - that might be taken the wrong way by the significant others in our lives, unfortunately. (But hey, you're all invited to my villa when we're 60, to hell with it...) I don't always agree with the quote from When Harry Met Sally that men and women can't be friends because sex always gets in the way -- sometimes it does, absolutely; sometimes friendship just isn't enough, and that can be difficult and depressing. But sometimes conversation, an alternate viewpoint, a sense of humor and the knowledge that someone from the other team is on your side is quite good enough. And greatly valued.

I love my friends - may we all celebrate an infinite number of future years together. Even those of you who aren't Scorpios.